I understand how absolutely crippling and disabling anxiety can be for our mind, bodies, relationships, work and our lives. I get it, that constant ache in the shoulder from the energetic crushing weight of suffering with anxiety. The curling into a ball, making yourself small, running from your bigness. The hearts ache to be fully seen conflicting with the nervous system’s command to be invisible. The lions- God the lions they use to explain the analogy of our primitive brain perceiving lion equivalent threats in our modern environment. The frustration at the inner alarm system roaring in your ears, the lengths we go to to reduce the inner noise.

For as long as I can remember, I raged at my body, at my mind, for reacting in these disturbing ways. Which understandably resulted in my conscious self leaving my body through dissociation until the panic was over and I was no longer under attack, from myself. Tara Brach explains that there are two arrows connected with suffering, the first arrow being the event or stimulus which pierces us with pain. The second arrow we shoot ourselves, shaming, blaming and raging for the feeling induced after the first arrow was shot. We kick ourselves whilst we’re down. We make ourselves bad for experiencing anxiety and awful if it has influenced our decisions, if it keeps us small. We wish to be ‘normal’ (whatever this means) which amplifies our suffering.

Nobody is ‘normal’.

If you are trying to be normal, you will never know how Amazing you can be”, Maya Angelou.

The thing is, we were packed up and sent to Earth school with a set of gifts to contribute to the bettering and evolution of this place. Each of us have a different set off gifts we incarnate with into this lifetime. Being ‘normal’ is the absence of these gifts. The good news is, we can’t get rid of these gifts, they are intrinsic to our authentic, unique nature. The bad news is, through conditioning we create so much distance between ourselves and our gifts making it difficult to identify and be present with these gifts. Through ongoing cultural conditioning we have been led to believe our gifts are curses. So we suppress our gifts and abandon these parts of our true self under the pretence to be ‘normal’. To be accepted, validated, and feel a sense of love and belonging that we are biologically designed to seek, for survival and evolutionary purposes.

Anxiety is not a Curse; it is a Gift.

We’ve been very literally schooled to deny our gifts, to be uniformed and the same under the disguise of being unified. Rather than celebrating our unique differences and authentic qualities, we have been taught the separation and ostracizing of differences. Our gifts are feared because of the undeniable concentration of power they hold and the rippling impact using them would have upon this world and the systems holding us in a mental prison of fear and shame.

Anxiety is a gift because you FEEL. We have been living in a world teaching linear living with an underlying current of disconnection from what it means to be human. A disconnect from our heart centre, of what it is to truly feel. We sit on our gifts through numbing out behaviours, then adopt those same behaviours in desperate attempt to feel alive again. Really, we just need to feel the authentic ebbs and flows of what it means to be human living on this planet in this lifetime. We need to be able to contract to allow the space for expansion and growth. This is exactly what anxiety sufferers experience.

They ride the somatic wave of anxiety. We have been taught to fight this experience, to make this happening and ourselves bad for our bodies responding in this way. We are emotional energetic beings, anxiety sufferers have a hyper-conscious energetic and emotional body. Meaning their intrinsic system detects energies, both physical sense and beyond, more frequently and with more ease than others are able to. The psychic self is able to tune into psychic happenings, which freaks the logical mind out because it is often beyond what can be seen, heard or physically touched. Anxiety sufferers are often highly intuitive with more open, higher functioning chakras and a rich inner world making them incredibly creative when they have opportunities for outlet. Due to their increased sensitivity they are often highly empathic with the ability to literally feel the emotional energy of others.

Using Your Gifts.

I truly understand the weight of what it is to experience anxiety alive within the body on a regular basis. It truly changed my inner world and my relationship with myself when almost 10 years ago I was advised by my therapist at the time to research Highly Sensitive Persons (HSP). I was able to welcome my gift of heightened sensitivity, viewing myself from an empowered and honouring place as opposed to shaming myself for my body doing this seemingly weird shit! I started the journey of divorcing the need to be ‘normal’ and celebrating all that makes me unique. This included being able to truly witness in plain sight how my highly sensitive bodies were able to meet others in the depths of their pain within my own therapeutic and healing offerings. I have supported, guided and celebrated many other humans learning the harsh lessons of Earth school in ways I would not have been able to if it wasn’t for my ability to feel them so deeply. I’ve been blessed with the ability to bring emotionality into logical, linear spaces starved of emotional expression and all it is to be human, to feel.

Celebrate you. Instead of seeing yourself as broken or abnormal, see how your creator designed you perfectly. Packed you up with a beautiful set of gifts specific for your blueprint path and mission during your time here. If you say ‘yes’, your gifts will serve you and/or others here if they haven’t already. Celebrate been highly sensitive and all the opportunities this opens up for you, to connect with others more deeply, to create genuine authentic connections, to understand and express the depths of the emotional world in ways others may not yet be acquainted with yet. Beginning to see where we abandon and shame ourselves for being or responding in ways not aligned with the status quo, can help bring clarification around where we may be seeking a sense of belonging or validation from others. Unlearning this conditioning begins with practising self acceptance, having our own backs when others may deem us weird or strange.

During difficult seasons, gift yourself what you need. Rather than fighting and resisting what’s happening inside through attacking anxiety and panic, help yourself to feel self and use outlets of creative expression to explore this. Acknowledging that we are energetic beings able to pick up what’s happening beyond the physical senses can help us understand that there are sometimes spiritual threads running through the anxiety coursing within our bodies. As humans we are experiencing a huge wave of spiritual awakening right now, which is explained further in my Waking Women Ebook This impacts us physically, emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually. The logical mind may not always understand what is taking place, we can set the intention to be OK with this.

Remember, during times your anxiety feels like a curse, that you have gifts to bring to those around you and this world. You and your gifts are here for a purpose my fellow Highly Sensitive.